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1. |
Exiled
03:56
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A man exiled
Planted seeds of resentment
Would they sprout horns?
Three leaves or four?
Crawl on hands and knees
Make you wish you never breathed
Or cried, or tried to feed their needs
Make you wish you never breathed
Your neglect is an act of empathy
Made a prison my hope, my home
A prison of bones, my bones
If you knew me when my bones were soft
If knew me when I could hardly talk
I don’t want to bleed for you to see
The ridiculing sun exposes all shortcomings
Ashamed I’m here, consumed by fear
That they’ll hear, whispered wishes fell deaf on ears
Don’t talk, it’s obvious
I’m always sorry
A man exiled
Planted seeds of resentment
Would they sprout horns?
Three leaves or four?
Crawl on hands and knees
Make you wish you never breathed
Or cried, or tried to feed their needs
Make you wish you never breathed
Your neglect is an act of empathy
Made a prison my hope, my home
A prison of bones, my bones
If you knew me when my bones were soft
If knew me when I could hardly talk
I don’t want to bleed for you to see
The ridiculing sun exposes all shortcomings
Too smart for my own good
I wasted all my time trying to make it last, leave impact
Holding my own hand, no winning over
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2. |
Hiding Places
04:17
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Shaving black sheep
Cutting off the weakest link
Wreaking pulling rotten teeth
I lived the past in prayer
Freedom from true poverty
Come from your hiding place
Hovering with angels
Amongst a field of daisies
Abstaining from short-lived ecstasies
Where your fingers ache emotion
And your pulse races, dripping with anticipation
Shaking for a sun that shines for all
Locked in the burning sea
Lair of my temples
All the nightmares prepared me
The falling balloons, empty rooms
You fill me with a sensitive fear
The harm in us
It’s not just you, I deny me
A burning blue eternity
The aversion left my system soaking
Blessed with the scars you leave
I am worthy
It’s not just you, I deny me
A burning blue eternity
Have your way
Vultures waiting to prey
I always wanted to runaway
But tears aren’t the best souvenirs
There are a million stairs to heaven
But only 7 circles to hell
I’m always running and hiding
I throw myself with skill, killing myself I grow
They don’t teach you how to find yourself
Talking never helps
Shaving black sheep
Cutting off the weakest link
Wreaking pulling rotten teeth
I lived the past in prayer
Freedom from true poverty
Come from your hiding place
Hovering with angels
Amongst a field of daisies
Abstaining from short-lived ecstasies
Where your fingers ache emotion
And your pulse races, dripping with anticipation
Shaking for a sun that shines for all
Locked in the burning sea
If I’d lighten up, I’d fly
Lost my voice trying not to cry
Curses got my tongue
I think the light at the end of the tunnel has died
Circling the sky, glass eyes
To be a mermaid with sutured thighs
I cried an hour straight, there’s no coming back
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3. |
Succor
04:01
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Walking backwards, moving forwards
I no longer like the look of it
Quiet critic, stare a little longer just to ruin it
Gridlocked my brain into a mulling hibernation
More than a moment of epiphany
Deeper than a dream
I can’t defuse this anticipation
I melt anxious, my body humming
I can’t settle with no control
My ears ring my pulse
Exploding with the loss of hope
Maimed the scheme of things
Best to keep my eyes open
Looking over my shoulder
I reject all proposals
Somethings coming
I’m so engaged mastering the art of killing time
With a sleepless mind
Succor the medieval
Keep me peacefully invisible, not alone
Winged bridges in these isolation towers
Moats and walls of emotion
Succor the medieval
My blood is fire, drying my heart
No sleep just long blinks, restless
Reciting what I can’t right
Speaking in people
It wasn’t quite discouraging
But it wasn’t quite encouraging
Challenging the stamina of ecstasy
Numbers and the unequal
I can’t hold a thought
Nothing last, as nothing stays
Shining nights
I can’t defuse this anticipation
I melt anxious, my body humming
I can’t settle with no control
My ears ring my pulse
Exploding with the loss of hope
Maimed the scheme of things
Best to keep my eyes open
Looking over my shoulder
I reject all proposals
Somethings coming
I’m so engaged mastering the art of killing time
With a sleepless mind
Light runs down the sky
Burning my eyes
Biting the bullet another day
Fuck Monday through Friday
Every day is Cryday
Light burn me up in your doorway
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4. |
Vehemence
02:54
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A hotbed, my will is red
My tongue a diamonds deathbed
Wilting holding dreams above my head
Words break me down to melt
Don’t ruin it, don’t ruin it
Keep it safe, don’t talk about it
The dragon said just a dream is legendary
Facing off, a dawn is met, a burning sunset
How to say nicely
Can you live with the death encrypted in your hands?
Pricked once by the bittersweet remorse
I warm my blood, the rivers running wild in me
The dark is my light, I grew with no sunshine
Flames licking, curling
I spit-shine my words, I deep throat swords
Until it hurts until it hurts
Etching the silence, sculpting ethereal sounds
Threading liquid as the petals drop silk
Parting the rolling clouds in my chest
In work, I rest
I want with a vehemence
That nourished a flower of bitter fruit
Hm, that permeates my bodies pores
Polluted me with emotional reactions
I fought myself tooth and nail
Weighing the heart
Weighing the light
My will is red, biting diamonds
On my deathbed, test me again
Blinded by this passion which promised such beautiful suffering
Adding charm, blind with pleasure
I met mortality and now I know the treasures contents
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5. |
The Fool Never Dies
03:56
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You embody all I reject
Disappointment I expect
All the emotions I try to neglect, coaching myself
I crack with emotion
I cried tears of joy
There’s nothing to miss
Peeling the skin back, so you can see what I’m thinking
So, you’ll believe me the optimist lives inside me
The frustration what’s stranger?
That I don’t remember altogether
Or that we talk as strangers
You leave before I ask
Is it too soon to say goodbye?
Churning me up inside
Don’t comeback this time
His jet brown eyes
Rose emulsified
The fool never dies
The fool never dies
The love in his tone
The warmth gives me chills
It’s hard to kill with kindness
Drawing boundary lines to case your motive
Reciting conversations, careful contemplations
Thinking until debilitating
The love in his tone
The warmth gives me chills
It’s hard to kill with kindness
You had me at insufficient
It hurts too much to want
Given this emptiness
Your kiss feels like scorn
Hand so warm
Never touched before
Like its search and destroy
You throw back the stars like a shot
Why must you make my heart drop
You’ll never know me
Hunting vicious happiness, perhaps a train track
I calculated every step, saving energy
With hopeless despondency on my back
I look back at the reflection to prove that
I was more than polarizing madness
And the sadness they perceive
When I laugh it scares me
Selfish desire, glossing my thoughts
You’ll never know me
I did have love you, briefly insufferable
But I was never in love with you
I discovered it
Hunting but tempted by nothing
Obsessed with the truth
Running circuits through the walls
Dredging archives
How’d you break my heart?
How’d we fall apart
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6. |
Cloud Nine
04:18
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A silent killer, hmm a quiet fight
And those dark nights
It’s no one else but you and I, finally
Hush the butterflies
Close your eyes
Thought too soon, spoke too late, it’s too late
Why do you deny me?
But I believe in this
My own happiness
Lost myself mid-sentence
You homicide while, I suicide
Let the plunge skin me alive, to let it burn
Waiting out my turn of the table
My dreams are practical, actual
They catch me if I fall from my highs
Back to the clouds
The last thing I saw
The first thing I knew
You make up for all the times I’ve cried
And those dark nights
It’s no one else but you and I, finally
Hush the butterflies
Close your eyes
It’s not about being maintaining
It’s about growing
You give me meaning
Thunder though its sunny
Lighting in the snow
Moon midday
No place for kings
Cloud 9, cloud 9
We are divine nothing else matters
Shining from the inside out
Cloud 9, cloud 9
Here in my mind, lets melt away
The clouds relieve me
The clouds roll with me
Intoxicated with your purity
My heart turned up everywhere
The simplicity of me, myself and I
The recipe to ecstasy
I can’t call it irony when actions stare at me
Masked death wishes, kisses
In the form of desire, kisses
Riddle imagination with holes
Black and white, Othello
Haphazard whimsy
The last thing I saw
The first thing I knew
You make up for all the times I’ve cried
And those dark nights
It’s no one else but you and I, finally
Hush the butterflies
Close your eyes
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7. |
Aphrodite Complex
03:32
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A creeping wallflower, a soft girl
Offers air, a gesture
Siren won’t you show yourself
The sea has swallowed me
Now honor me
All day I question shy, shy
I reserve aggression
How I’m not surprised
Some men run with a compliment
I am not surprised I shrink farther
Threatening hmm I could just disappear
Into your projections
And I don’t mind
It makes it easier
Dimming fixtures
Come break the water, wear your skin
Come feel the waves, give me dreams (finally)
Come, come and get me, wear your skin (drown me)
Apex an episode
I deliver myself
I hold my breath
Dive reflex, dive reflex
Curled my knees to my chest
Centered to the core
I help myself, dive reflex
Groaning depths
Counting my breaths
The moans buried themselves
Burrowed sharp sighs
You can’t hear even if your quiet
Limited to another’s mind
I am the mother, quiet daughter
The cause calls me miscreant
Reading my fingerprints
Enclosing myself in lattice
I am the father
The divine counterpart
The marriage of broken parts
Speak my religion, listen
Evermore the martyr
I wish better
I apply my effort, to soften a cold bed
No flinching, claim me
I press myself inside, thick skin a life symptom
The temporary high of the low, thick skin grew thin
Can you see the blood within?
Let the blood flow, like dropping petals in a row
And I listen to the giving out
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8. |
To A Dream's Address
03:39
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My blind spot, I can’t fathom you as lie
Hm, friendly fire
A vision smothered memory, earthly
Of what we could be
But you need the scars to see
But you need the scars to see
All the possibilities
Estranged somethings got me disregarding your superiority
Like I got nothing to lose, I decay
Fade away the longer I stay
I close my eyes and I’m all you fear
I’m so past your approval
Make yourself useful
I don’t need you to be beautiful
Make yourself useful
I disappear, Immortal beyond see
Beyond we, stranger than fantasy, I disappear
When I see your face
I fall into grace, a misfit full of disgrace
You are heaven-sent
The word legend repents in your presence
Origin ascent, in the mist you exist
Its fate, just wait
To a dreams address
You fulfill me
Selfish, but this shits selfless
Cavalier you take my place
Caving in on myself, animosity buoys
Pit the walls against me
Too many cases of mistaken identity
Erased with understanding
Crippling you replace me with trite
Watered me down to shame
Redefining me every second
Since you have no patience
You can’t die now
The weakness is empowering
I thrive now, please, stop flirting with me
Too much passion not to suffer
Born to die a lover
Feed my fantasy, I yearn for you
Thinking until I’m dizzy
I trained my brain to never sour a dream too young
To compromise for the ground
In the sky among the clouds they hung
The air dungeon
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A Flower in Disguise Ohio
Singer/songwriter/producer/visual artist and writer.
Making experimental music
Streaming and Download help
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